Never Again!

20 Mar

I hereby declare that I will never, EVER go to another movie rated PG-13 or less while it is playing in a theater unless it is a matinee on a school day or after curfew or someone comes up with implementing my brilliant idea of having separate screenings for those movies for ADULTS and not punk-ass kids who don’t give a damn that they’re ruining the show for everyone else because mommy and daddy just threw some money at them and told them to get the hell out of the house. Oh, and I’ll never see ANY movie at the theater in Reston Town Center again. A) It’s a shithole. B) It’s full of the aforemetioned punk-ass kids. C) The management blows.

So, to explain the venom behind this rant… I went to go see The Ring Two tonight. I’ve been waiting on pins and needles to see this movie, and I had a long, crappy week, so I was primed for some entertainment and a short, scary break from reality. HA! From the very beginning, a gaggle of about 20 kids ranging from the age of 14 to 14 (yes, you read that right) were yelling, cussing, laughing, throwing things, talking on their cell phones and walking in and out of the theater. People asked and then told them to shut up. At least ten people walked out and didn’t come back. I decided to stick it out and see if they would shut the fuck up. What was I thinking???

***Movie Spoiler Alert*** To top it off, the movie SUCKED. I can excuse a slow start, but combine a slow start with BAD acting and the lowest special effects budget since the first episode of Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood (if you’ve seen the deer scene, you KNOW what I mean)… well, it was just not worth being aggravated to the point of homicide just to watch a crappy movie.

So, about halfway through, we walked out. While I was waiting for someone to track down a manager for me so I could give him a piece of my mind about my feelings on spending twenty bucks to waste an hour of my life, I noticed two rent-a-cops standing in the lobby shooting the breeze while these punks ran in and out of the theater we were in, obviously causing a scene. Did they do anything? Nope… must be waiting for that minimum wage increase before they actually decide to do their jobs. Nice. Get me even more ticked.

Then, the popcorn jockey comes back to tell me he can’t find the manager right then and that if I want a refund (I didn’t tell him that, but he could guess by how pissed I was), I could just go to the box office and get my money back. Yeah, but can I please have a refund on the two hours of my life I wasted waiting for and watching this piece of shite with a bunch of pre-pubescent shitheads?


Netflix is my new best friend.


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